Monday, 12 April 2010

Two Zucchini Flowers - A Word Challenge

You have me feeling as green as a zucchini
I’ve had lovers before, you and many more
But I’m a girl at heart; I don’t want to be seduced
I just want to be enchanted, so enchant me

My heart opened like a zucchini flower
But then you dropped me like a zucchini flower
You hit me with a zucchini flower
When I refused to cook for you last night

The memories of the good times will hold me
Though your fraying love for me has thrown me
You use to sing to me of blue goodbyes, over open skies
You use to enchant me

It began on a Sunday, as affairs often do
We went to the markets,
you juggled three zucchini flowers, dropped one
And I fell in love with you

Later, you kissed me in the garden
And we lay down in the summer sun
The sweet scent of crushed vegetables
The sweet tremble of your hand, your heart
I didn’t know it wouldn’t last

I’m feeling green and blue about you
The push and pull of love is true
But I watch you playing games with me
The push and pull of heart strings

I tried to make it work, but there isn’t anything left
I’ve peeled away our skins, and the only feeling left is hurt
If you hadn’t been so rough, if I hadn’t been so sharp
I just wanted to be enchanted, I forgot that that’s
just not enough.

I realized just last night, the clue was there
It was there right from the start
When you juggled those three zucchini flowers
You were really juggling with my heart

Saturday, 10 April 2010

"Many Many" Challenge (A Creative Brief)

Anyone can live with many

Many ways to live with all,

but then there’s many, many

hungry, and many more are feeling cold

Many reasons stop us giving

Many more tell us to wait –

but when there’s many children crying –

there’s just one beating heart and hand at stake…

There are many, many ways to leave things too late.

Tuesday, 16 March 2010

Fallen Lucy - A Song

Lucy, was looking into the clouds

Matthew, was looking at Lucy

Lucy was falling into the ground

(Into the ground)

Matthew was diving at the clouds

Lucy fell into the ground

Matthew dived into the clouds

Their worlds circled round each other

the sky, wouldn’t meet the ground

(meet the ground)

Lucy looked at Matt and smiled

held up her hands and caught the sun

and said, this is for you

Matthew looked at Lucy and cried

you gave me the sun

when I fell through the clouds

but I would have been happy

just to have your smile

(to have your smile)

Lucy fell into the ground

Matthew dived into the clouds

Their worlds circled round each other

the sky couldn’t meet the ground

(meet the ground)

Lucy’s smile lit up her face

through Lucy’s lashes Matthew

saw himself reflected

and, echoed Lucy’s smile

(Lucy’s smile…)

but the sun flew out

from Matthews mouth

it was too much for him to bear

and the ground opened up beneath them

and swallowed Lucy whole

(Lucy whole)

Lucy fell into the ground

and Matthew dived into the clouds

Matthew, dived into the clouds

(Into the clouds)

Their worlds circled round each other

the sky wouldn’t meet the ground

sky wouldn’t meet the ground

meet the ground

meet the ground

meet the ground

meet the ground

sky wouldn’t meet the ground


Eucalyptus; a majestic tree

Stark, powerful and magic

Weeping fronds, droop like keening women

towards the red earth

Claylike, the earth supports the tree

in its solidarity.

Friday, 12 March 2010

Haiku Attempt 2 - The Spring of Each Season

Creeping coldness eats at

Summers warm and tender rays of light

Speaks of autumn leaves

Orange burnished shadows

falling silently from trees

crackle on the ground

Twitter and shuffle

of small creatures on the leaves

create seasonal song

Heat fades with bitter rain

wind drifts, moves autumn along

the forest cries

Summer dies, autumn cries

Winter springs, into new life

flowers curl open.

Haiku Attempt - A Petite Cat (Gets even with the Goldfish)

A petite cat lifts

her soft paw - bats at goldfish

The fish shimmers, reflects

Water in the bowl

A strand of weed sways gently

To the filters tide

The pebbles spin, shoot

And spin from the goldfish mouth

The cat paws her prey

Visitations and light bulbs in the night

It’s official. I’m scared of ghosts. Can I be scared of something I don’t believe in? Well, after experiencing my lights turning on and off for no reason – even when the light switch is in the other room – and my fan suddenly turning itself on, depressions of air making sounds like footsteps in the hall and my friend in the spare room emitting high pitched giggles and mumbling at 2am … yes, I’m freaked out.

Of course the fan and the light wires might be crossed – which makes sense when I turn the light on and get the fan instead – but what about when the light turns on by itself, waking me up at 11pm and again at 3am last night. Freaky.

I’m up late at night now, exhausted and still sick, but a bit too squeamish to go to bed yet. I’d better go soon though – TV is fast turning in to a bunch of sex phone line ads, and some retarded exercise routine called “Zumba”. I’ve been watching it for so long that I’m almost considering it – even though the “previously fat people” all look like professional dancers and the guy who’s selling the dvd (for the low, low price of $145) looks like a real wanker. And their ear to ear smiles are almost as scary as my ghost.

I’ve been trying not to talk about it much, the ghost, except to laugh about it … because otherwise it’s just going to freak me out even more. But right now I just need someone to hug in bed with me and scare away the ghost for me.

I never should have watched Paranormal Activity. I thought it was a stupid movie and I didn’t find it scary at the time. It’s the ideas that the movie put in my head that started all this off; it doesn’t help that I live near a cemetery …

Right. I’m going to bed. And I’m not taking the Zumba dvd or any ghosts with me.

Thursday, 11 March 2010

Food Poisoning Fun

I will never eat pork and coriander dumplings that are on sale from my local Asian Grocery store again. Two days of food poisoning followed by a head cold is not my cup of green tea.

Sunday, 7 March 2010

Happiness is a lie

You think I’m happy all the time

But I’m just holding it all in

You think I’m happy all the time

But I’m just sitting here and killing time

My life’s been golden enough

Even when I was doing it tough

I never had to sleep it rough

I never asked for more than enough

You think I’m happy all the time

But there've been times I didn’t have a dime

Still, I never had to sleep it rough

I never asked for more than enough

It’s not that I’m not happy all the time

It’s just that I’ve had a fair share of

sadness in my time

It’s not that I’m arguing the point

But you seem to think I’m happy all the time

And that’s just not the way it is

The way it is with me

You think I’m happy all the time

Still, that’s just not the way it is

The way it is with me.

Wednesday, 3 March 2010

Then the phone rang.

The phone rang. I didn’t recognize the number so I almost didn’t pick it up. But I’d had a job interview that morning so I thought, what the hey!

“Hello? Lucy speaking.”

“Hello there”.

Quick pause for lightening bolt to travel down my spine - holy crap it was my ex, Daniel. Damn him for always getting a reaction out of me. I answered cautiously.

“Hello Daniel”.

“Hey, you recognized my voice.”

“So I did, not like last time.”

He had called about six months ago with a new number and made me guess. I hadn’t been expecting it, as he hadn’t called me for a year and a half before that; so I didn’t clue into who he was, for a while. Eventually the penny had dropped.

“What time?”

Bastard, I knew he’d put me on the spot.

“Ah, just some time I didn’t recognize you voice, ages ago.” I trailed off awkwardly.

“Sooo, I’m holidaying on the Sunshine Coast with some friends and I was wondering if you still know anyone here?”

Random, where was this going?

“Um, no, not really; most of my friends have moved away and the rest I don’t talk to anymore, mainly because they are still there. Why?”

“Well I was wondering if you have any, connections.” Daniel paused.

Ah, the penny dropped – again. He wanted drugs.

“I don’t really know anyone like that, well, maybe Julie. But she lives on the Gold Coast now, so probably not” I rolled my eyes.

“Hmmm, the Gold Coast, that’s a bit far away.”

“Well if you’re that keen.”

“Surely she must still know people here right?” he said persuasively. God he had a sexy voice, just dripping with suave confidence. “Come on, we’re friends aren’t we?”

“Yeah, friends”, I snickered sarcastically, “Great friends”.

His voice dropped – and became blunt and annoyed – as he dropped all pretenses.

“Ok, well, great to talk to you. See you around and all”.

“Yeah, sure.” I said flatly.

“Talk later, bye!” Daniel hung up.

Bastard, I was almost tempted to call Julie, but wasn’t about to degrade myself that far. I threw my phone down. All of a sudden I had an idea and my face lit up in a wide smirk. About two years ago a friend of mine had given me this number called “My Fake”. If someone you didn’t like asked for your number and you couldn’t get rid of them, you handed it out. When the unfortunate person called the number, they would go straight to a rejection line voicemail and a young guy’s voice saying,

“Hi you’ve contacted the rejection line. The person who gave you this number never wants to see you again. We’d like to take this opportunity to officially reject you. Please feel free to leave a voice mail, or alternatively, you can send a picture message to this number. Happy New Year!”

Then a different male voice saying, “Sorry this message box is already full”

I laughed, evilly; this was going to be fun. I picked up the phone and looked for the number, then wrote it down and tried it out to make sure it still worked. It did, perfect. I sent Daniel an sms:

“Julie – 041_______, have fun.

Immediately he sent one back

“Thanks! Did you warn her I would call?”

I smirked

“Go right ahead”

My phone beeped and I grabbed it

“You’re a champ, D"

You don’t know the half of it, I thought, almost apoplectic with laughter.

I went to the kitchen to make myself tea. I had been sitting too long at the computer listening to music and talking on msn, I needed warming up. My nervous system was shot after the call with Daniel. I filled up the kettle and gazed out the window, it was starting to get dark earlier, I thought absentmindedly. Suddenly my phone beeped again. I lunged for it with glee.

It was Daniel.

“Ice cold.”

I burst out laughing. Oh my God, hilarious. I wasn’t sure if he’d actually call the number. He completely fell for it! So. Funny. I sat back down at the computer, a stupid smirk on my face. Abruptly my phone rang; not surprisingly I didn’t know the number, yet again.

I answered with trepidation, “Hello?”

A male voice, a rather sexy one, spoke into my ear. I could hear in his voice that he was trying to suppress his laughter.

“Hi, you don’t know me; I’m James, Daniel’s brother. I just called to say that was absolutely brilliant!”

He started to laugh and I heard Daniel’s voice hollering something in the background.

“That’ll learn him”, I said dryly.

“Really, that was fantastic. He’s still laughing. We all are. You’ve had us rolling on the floor for the last five minutes!”

I grinned. “Glad to be of service. I’ve had that number for so long and I’ve never had a chance to use it. Sorry, I couldn’t resist.” I was wicked with delight. I knew Daniel’s wry sense of humour.

James chortled, “Seriously, don’t be sorry. It was too good. He had no idea at all! Fantastic, you totally got him.”

“Glad to be of service,” I replied. “About Julie, I would, but…”

James cut me off, “Don’t worry about it, seriously, you given us plenty. We’ll be laughing about this for the rest of the night. Great to talk to you though”

“You too”, I smiled.

And hung up.

Sunday, 28 February 2010

General musings ...

Life would be better if my hair wasn't so high maintenance.

Sunday, 21 February 2010

Self Improvement 101

When I was 18 I thought: I’m annoying, I’m shy, and I think I know everything. I have got to change. So I moved myself out of my comfort zone, moved out of home, and made new friends. I stopped listening to my parents, and I didn’t let narcissism and fear hold me back.

The idea was to work on developing my personality, typically the hardest thing to change about you, by watching what I did and didn’t like about other people and recognizing what I did and didn’t like within myself. I suppose I was modeling myself on characteristics of people I admired or thought were laid back and “cool”. I thought it would only take a few years, but here I am at 26, no longer modeling myself on others (especially just because I think they’re cool), but still trying to control and acknowledge my bad points and irradiate or improve on them.

What I didn’t realize at 18, and what I am only just beginning to realize now, is that self improvement isn’t a liner progression, it’s a lifelong struggle. But, I think I’m up to it. I think I had already achieved something when, at 18, I realized that I’m not faultless.

And thank god for that. How else would I learn?

Wednesday, 17 February 2010

The contact lense nightmare and resurgence in blogging interest

I nearly poked my eye out today while attempting to take contact lenses out for the first time. I pinched my eye several times, and after half an hour of stress and whimpering I had to get my kind flatmate to help me take the left contact out.

It was a nightmare, and I ended up looking like I'd been crying all day. I'm very scared of putting them back in again, but I have to master this, or how am I going to get along, blind, in Europe?

I called my dear mum and she said it took her four brands to get it right. That's a worry - this is my second brand already. My eye still hurts, but I'm going to make this work.

I am considering making this blog about something more than poetry ... maybe about my struggles with improving my writing. I've always been a "sprinter" in life, and this seems to be reflected in my writing. I never finish anything unless it can be done in one or two sittings.

If I just write whatever I feel like writing on here, then it might work. Poetry, prose, dialogue, my thoughts ... I might have to change the blog title.

I saw the movie Julie and Julia today, and I think that's what's sparked this resurgence of blogging interest. Fingers crossed my sprint turns in to a marathon run.

See ya later alligator

Tuesday, 9 February 2010

is contemplating emerald green and russet red

I want to croon, into the microphone, like it’s nobody’s business but yours.
Money isn’t real
Nothing can bring me down now, you’ve already brought out the big guns, is that all you’ve got?
You’ve already shown your hand, where do we go from here?
Nothing can bring me down, solid as a pound
Before you get excited, it won’t last long.
Before you take a look, I must warn you – illusions can be dangerous, to your state of mind.
Before you take a picture – remember how I feel.
Before you pluck that flower, remember the busy bee.
Before you wink at me, think how I might react.
Before, you pause, jump in.
Jump. Sometimes that’s the only thing you can do,
For unconventional smiles and silly feelings of giddiness and love.
Before the eleventh hour, take stock. It may be your last chance to fly in amber skies and swim through moving oceans.
And live.

Saturday, 23 January 2010

Without shoes on

I spent my childhood without shoes on. Only when I laced up my black clodhoppers for school did I feel the studious weight of leather and lace dragging me down, and my mood sinking with it.

As I dragged weary limbs towards class – my holiday elevation plummeted into those ungainly soles.

Struggling sharp edges of grass, determinedly heaving up through the concrete paths made my feet itch inside their off-white cotton socks. I would run my hands through the wild long grass that pushed through the school fence, at lunch time; grass cuts crisscrossing my dry hands.

The bubblers would cool the stinging, and quench my thirst, from the shimmering Queensland noon heat. I never have dealt well with extremes; I still don’t.

Thursday, 21 January 2010


This strangely beautiful quality of light. Magnificent and sudden – surreal, the rolling thunder – slice of lightening. The lime green of trees, once olive shaded. The rain picks up, momentum gathers. Pelts down upon the tin roof, ricocheting on my face and breast, as I lean out the window in abandoned delight.
For now, my worries leave me and I feel calm and free and filled with kinetic energy. And then, I shut the window. But light still pours in, so I shut the blinds. I can still hear the thunder, so I shut my ears. Last, I close my mind. And now the sky is pink with violence.


The sticky words
Will come pouring out of me as vomit
For you to chew on like cud, tasting different,
with every person whose ears they pollute.

Tuesday, 19 January 2010

Caught in the tumble

Thinking, thinking –
I’m filled with thoughts
bubbling up – secretly.
They find me – hiding – under tables
smiling, at nothing, much.

They find me – posed – ready to jump
in to my bowl of cereal
to morosely float on a slice of

They control my spoon
Swirl and twirl – on banana.

As I spin, I catch glimpses
Of what could be – each whirl of
milk shows another possibility.

I lack the capacity to choose –
caught - as I am in the tumble.